this is where i've been. aac films is now based in seattle, wa.

Join us on the 40th Anniversary of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s assassination. This historic event will celebrate his extraordinary life and present positive solutions from today's generation of visionary leaders. A bullet killed the dreamer, but not the dream. Together, we will create ecological solutions to heal the earth while bringing jobs, justice, wealth and health to all our communities...

in the summer, there's the 10th annual allied media conference, june 20-22 @ wayne state university in detroit, mi. aac films will definitely be there, and you should too.

check out this recap video of last year's amc by diana nucera.

i have since gotten to know alixa and naima, and love them dearly. you should get to know them too, especially when they come through your city this year during their "hurricane season: the hidden messages in water" tour.

here's an introduction to who they are:

this is an old video, but it's new to me.

they're leveraging the reach of myspace to not only educate, uplift, and support black women, but challenge all who disrespect us by either regarding us as bitches, tricks and hos, or allowing others to do it.

this is their pledge:

1. I promise to always love and honor myself and my people as the beautiful, intelligent, and regal individuals that we are

2. I promise to never sell my self-respect for any amount

3. I promise to stand up and demand my respect from any and everyone that is foolish enough to compromise it

4. I promise to treat others as I would like to be treated

5. I promise to be a leader and never a follower - even if it means losing friends

6. I promise to never let the entertainment industry decide what is acceptable and what isn't - I make the decisions as the consumer

7. I promise to lead by example and show our youth the right path

8. I promise to NEVER disrespect the mothers of civilization

we do have plans to document our move and our exploration of new orleans, so stay tuned!

"When we speak we are afraid our words will not be heard or welcomed. But when we are silent, we are still afraid. So it is better to speak." —Audre Lorde

October 31, 2007, Be Bold, Be Red, Stop the violence against women of color.

Simple Ways to Participate on October 31,2007

If it is DIFFICULT to HOST or to attend a Red RALLY/GATHERING,PLEASE WEAR RED, GET WITH YOUR FRIENDS and at 8:00 pm CENTRAL READ in Unison the "OUT OF SILENCE LITANY" BECAUSE PEOPLE FROM ACROSS THE NATION WILL BE DOING THE same thing. Please take Pictures and/or Video and EMAIL us at beboldbered[AT]gmail.com, so that we can upload them on the website.

After October 31, 2007, we want to flood the web with pictures and video of Red!!!

• Wear RED


• Read "Out of Silence" Litany at 8:00 pm/central time


• Take Pictures and/or video and email them to beboldbered[AT]gmail.com (After October 31, 2007, we want to "flood" the web with pictures and video of RED)
  For more information about wearing Red and local events in your area, please visit Document the Silence

If you have questions, please email us at beboldbered[AT]gmail.com.

"be bold be brave be red stop the violence"

Recent events in the United States have moved us to action. Violence against women is sadly, not a new phenomenon in our country or in the world, however, in the last year women of color have experienced brutal forms of violence, torture, rape and injustice which have gone unnoticed, received little to no media coverage, or a limited community response. We are responding to:

• The brutal and inhumane rape, torture, and kidnapping of Megan Williams in Logan, West Virginia who was held by six assailants for a month.


• Rape survivors in the Dunbar Housing Projects in West Palm Beach, Florida one of whom was forced to perform sexual acts on her own child.


• A 13 year old native American girl was beaten by two white women and has since been harassed by several men yelling "white power" outside of her home.


• Seven black lesbian girls attempted to stop an attacker and were latter charged with aggravated assault and are facing up to 11 year prison sentences.

Be Bold Be Red Stop the Violence Against Women of Color

first, my friend's original bulletin post:

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I know it's a big joke in Chicago, but in a way, this small hot-dog stand on the north side is very much a microcosm of Chicago in that it represents how "hyper-segregated" Chicago is. Fucked up shit. Delicious when covered in mustard, but fucked up:

Discuss...
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hell, if you really want to have a conversation, call me on skype: aacfilms

now then, the weiner's circle *is* a big joke in chicago, and at some point i stopped laughing. it was probably right after i witnessed the black female staff in fist fights with white female customers several times while passing by late at night. actually, i don't think i was ever laughing, because the so-called gimmick of engaging your customers in "friendly" games of gunnin' has never been amusing or entertaining to me. i don't tolerate someone i know insulting me, so i'm certainly not going to pay for the privilege of having a total stranger do so. i've set foot inside the weiner's circle exactly twice, and my not returning had nothing to do with the food.

on the surface, i suppose the weiner's circle wants people to believe the insults are as harmless as the ones you may encounter at ed debevic's, or at a neighborhood bar where everyone knows everyone else, but you have to wonder where the line of demarcation between "good-natured fun" and pissing someone off is, especially in the context of running a business. how do you know when you go too far when you're dealing with someone you don't know? and more importantly, why even run that risk? i'm not kidding when i say i've seen staff there come from behind the counter and get in fist fights with people, and i once saw one of the female staff holding a chef's knife chase a customer out. the majority of people visiting the weiner's circle know what they may be in for when they step in the place, but i don't get why people want to pay to be insulted. i paid for a hot dog, not for you to call me a bitch or a ho.

the owner's theory about people being "bad" by stumbling in drunk and wanting to be punished is interesting. i'm sure there maybe some folks like that, but let me nerd out a bit and mention occam's razor. essentially, a lot of people go to the weiner's circle knowing they have a place to freely insult someone that probably won't get into a physical fight because they'd probably lose their job. simple, no? throw in the fact that the insults are a-okay, and you've got yourself a fucked up party!

beyond the alleged good-natured insults, there's a critical point about the weiner's circle that is clearly mentioned in the video: it's in a wealthy white neighborhood. to go one step further, all the staff, with the exception of the two white men who own the place, are black. at the risk of stating the obvious, i'll just say it: the owners are doing a brisk business thanks to good old fashioned racism. the insult exchanges with the staff are all part of the business, therefore it's expected and more importantly, accepted and encouraged. mix that with a bunch of drunk white folks, and suddenly it's okay to call the black staff niggers, monkeys, etc., as long as it's said with a smile. because after all, the drunk white boys don't really think the black women are hos, it's all in fun. it's a gimmick, a joke, remember?

while it may not be obvious to those on the aac films friend list, i am indeed black (my profile photo is me 30+ years ago), and i can't even begin to describe how painful and infuriating it was to watch this piece, particularly the second half as the chant for "chocolate milkshake" started. i've been called nigger (and frankly, i don't care how you spell the fucking word or who says it, it still means SLAVE) more than i care to mention, and while i can steel myself to it to a degree, it still makes me want to scream. watching the weiner's circle staff endure the racist comments sends me into a tangle of conflict. on the one hand, i want to smack every single drunken white asshole in the place, but on the other hand i want to shake the staff and make them realize they're being used by 2 white men who are making money not only from allowing their staff to be treated piss-poorly, but banking on their ability to put up with and feed into direct racism, and provide enough of an entertainment draw to keep a large, steady flow of customers. as maude said, it's fucked up.

okay, i could be all pc and say the white men who own the weiner's circle need to be educated and see the error of their ways, and yes, they should, but that's not going to happen. they've been doing business in this manner for more than half of the life of their business. they know what they're doing and the ramifications of it, and they don't care because it makes the bottom line better. after all, business is business, right? right?

wrong. i understand gimmicks, i really do, but racism isn't a gimmick. the "sassy" black female staff are playing right into the stereotype that's expected of them. being living stereotypes, by the way, seems to be a chicago thing. perhaps you could pose the question of which came first, the staff insults or the customer insults, and i know in some minds, the customer surliness can be justified because the staff is rude, but keep in mind that the insult tradition was started by one of the frustrated owners, a white man. drunk white men may insult another white man, but let's face it, ethnicity won't be brought into the fray. he also won't be called a slut, ho, bitch, etc.

generally speaking, the weiner's circle is a typical hot dog stand during the day. the staff aren't overly friendly, but they don't typically insult customers either. this is a night time, particularly late night, phenomenon, when a lot of the customers are completely shitfaced after stumbling out of bars, clubs, and cubs games. keeping that in mind, think about these questions:
- if the staff were all white, would the insults be the same?
- if the staff were all white, would there be insults at all?
- if the staff were white women specifically, what would those insults turn into?

the counter staff at weiner's circle are black women, so in addition to the racism, there's a fair amount of misogyny, and the way women of color, particularly black women, are often regarded as whores by white men in our society. so you see, this isn't even a simple case of racism. racism rarely is.

i figured out early on what the deal with the weiner's circle was, and it's why they don't get my business. as a black person, it pains me to see other black people allowing themselves to be degraded, and then write it off as just being part of the job. if you get the occasional knucklehead coming in and making a racist remark, that's a different situation than being in an environment where not only does it happen almost every night, but is encouraged and considered part of the atmosphere, and i really wish the black folks working there would see it exactly for what it is.

racism won't go away because we *think* it should. i'm not interested in educating ignorant white people, i'm interested on educating people of color, who need to break out of their colonized mindset, and stop excusing racists, but instead challenge them. the late night dumbasses who call you a monkey at the weiner's circle don't do so because they're drunk and don't know what they're saying. they do so because they feel that way, but know when it's not appropriate to say it when sober. wake up folks.

to my sisters and brothers of color, PLEASE stop allowing yourselves to be used in this manner. i understand that you need a job, but please understand that your continuing to work at a place that condones and encourages racism by offering YOU up as a sacrificial lamb to white folks who are allowed to have an outlet for their racism and misogyny at the weiner's circle, sends the clear message that not only is it okay, but YOU'RE okay with it, and it's so obviously and clearly NOT okay. you can do better. WE can do better. we MUST do better.

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the footage:
i shot all the footage in this video on one night while driving with a friend. we were just killing time between dinner and meeting other friends.

the primary footage was just me filming out the passenger side window as we were driving. i ended up shooting about 45 minutes of b-roll footage that i had no immediate use for at that time, but i figured would be good to have in my personal stock footage library. the footage is completely straightforward and i don't think it needs any explanation. needless to say, my friend and i were talking during the entire drive, and while a great deal of our conversation *is* funny, i removed the audio track entirely.

the secondary footage, seen in the form of the "dancing lights/colors," is actually blown-up, rotated, skewed, slowed-down footage of headlights, taillights, and street lights. the "dancing lights/colors" happened because as i was filming the oncoming traffic, we hit a pothole, which made my arm bounce, and the taillights of the car in front of us, streaked across the lcd screen. i liked the effect (oooooh, shiny! oooooh, streaky!) so i started intentionally shaking the camera around (gently) while filming headlights, taillights, and street lights. i did this for about 3 minutes to get a lot of different colors and lights.

editing:
i was originally planning to use some of the video mashed up with some of the audio taken out of context, and some public domain video from the prelinger archives, but then i heard the song "mea bloanasir" by sigur ros, and that changed everything.

i consider myself to be an editor primarily, but that's when i have a clear idea of what i want to do, not to mention the footage to support that vision. this was not exactly the case with "beginning farewell" because i didn't know what kind of piece i wanted to make. i started with the primary footage of my filming the street from the passenger seat, and then... i stared at the empty timeline in final cut pro for about 45 minutes.

i wanted to experiment with overlaying footage over completely different footage, so i started with the primary footage, and initially added a second video track that ultimately didn't work. i scrapped it, and used the secondary footage of the lights. the original version used the lights exactly as i shot them, but it didn't work visually. the lights were too small and moved far too fast, but they did look good blended with the primary footage.

eventually, i chopped the video of the lights into short 10 second segments and randomly scaled them much larger, and in spots, rotated them, skewed them and slowed their playback speed down to 7-15% of the speed of the original footage.

mo edits/footage, mo problems:
the biggest problem i had in the editing process was the rendering. since the video is actually composed of 2 separate video tracks that are linked to one another via the blending modes of both video tracks, every single change, no matter how small it was, required re-rendering everything, which took a mighty long time. considering the video had no real prep work, storyboard, or plan, i constantly changed everything throughout the entire editing process. the entire editing process for this 2:15 video took over 6 hours. the majority of that time was spent rendering over and over and over again. any syncing between the overlay footage (the lights) and the music is a complete coincidence. if i'd intentionally tried to sync the lights with the music, the editing time would have increased exponentially.

the text was added later, after i realized that the video alone didn't seem all that interesting to watch for 2 minutes. i didn't even think about the text all that much, but i wanted to keep it simple. the music was really the reason for the text that was added. i like sigur ros, but i tend to think of their music as more than a little melancholy. this track seemed oddly hopeful, and so did my reflecting on leaving chicago at the time, so the text added became a look back at the 6 years i'd spent residing in chicago in very short form. it's a very short story told in 2 minutes.

the whole process took so long, that i didn't even think i liked the video at all. so, i after i tweaked all the text and the timing of when it appears, i declared it done, exported it to quicktime, and put it up. i was sure i didn't think the finished video was good, but i didn't think it was completely awful. it wasn't until i started showing it to other people that my opinion changed. everyone i showed it to, loved it. i finally removed myself from myself, and could see it as a not bad piece of video ;)

when i was able to look at the video more objectively, i realized that while it's a short story of 6 years told in 2 minutes, it's also an intro to what could be a larger piece, or a series of pieces. perhaps someday i'll get around to actually making those other parts of the story.

just so you know, "beginning farewell" it looks much better viewed in full screen mode (quicktime pro and miro player work well for that).

this year, i had my video camera with me, but i didn't actually film anything beyond some footage that will only be useful as b-roll footage on some future project. what i learned at the 2006 amc was that it's almost impossible to truly be present and document at the same time, and i was there to participate, not document.

i did remember to use my crappy camera phone as often as possible, which wasn't very often. in other words, i have a handful of crappy photos of a very small part of detroit. enjoy?

all photos were taken with a crappy palm treo 600 cell phone.

All photographs by leslie g stewart. Copyright 2007. All rights reserved.

i came across this video series called people are a trip. it's a simple idea, juliana luecking asks people questions, that range from "what is one thing you know to be true?" to "why do nations go to war?" and they answer her on camera.

this one is my favorite so far. check out madigan's music too.

juliana encourages you, yes YOU, to send her your answers in video, or in the case of this segment, a hand made zine.

simply awesome.

this was my third year attending the conference, and much like last year, i took so much away from it, that i have a hard time describing it or putting it into words.

a caveat: this year was the first year i wasn't at the amc solely as a free agent. i was there largely representing a non-profit organization, where i've freelanced as a teaching artist for the past 2 years. that being said, i was partially responsible for the chaperonage of 2 youth, which meant a lot less freedom than i'm used to. i've also been struggling a lot with activism and youth work, so even though i was present, i wasn't as present as i would have liked to be, but i knew that would be the case several months prior. to make matters worse, there was a lot of tension in my group for most of the weekend. in the end, an very important lesson on how i attend/participate in conferences has been learned on my part.

Gateway to Freedom monument, Detroit

as always, the amc for me is about the people as much as the information. i was exposed to so many really dope folks i definitely wouldn't cross paths with in chicago. if you've spent any length of time in chicago, you'd probably understand why. whether it was getting a huge hug from the beautiful spirit otherwise known as adrienne maree brown who doesn't know me from a hole in the wall, but showed me love anyway, or being moved to tears by 78-year old Joan after the opening plenary on Saturday morning (she had almost everyone present in tears), or being energized by scott kurashige during his pop ed workshop, or listening to alexis pauline gumbs read these words during the "hijacking the master's tools" panel, or having a kick-ass hour plus conversation with brittany shoot over live music at alvin's during the saturday music showcase (thank you, brittany for holding other white folks accountable for their supremacist bull), or being cracked up by 18-year old starlett lee of detroit summer collective, the people i connected with, even for a moment, were beautiful and inspiring souls.

the sessions were generally really good, especially grace lee boggs' keynote, and the sessions, "popular education for radical teaching and activism," "throw away the textbooks" (mostly because of the youth the presenters brought with them who spoke about their experiences), "history of black america as told through music" (blair is just awesome) "hijacking the master's tools," and finally being able to see the documentary "no!"

unfortunately, i was hit with a puzzling and extreme amount of fatigue (i literally had a hard time staying awake) during the weekend and i ended up getting fairly sick by saturday, so i missed a lot, and quite frankly, a lot of sessions i just wasn't feeling.

i tend to be very self-critical, but i think slym's workshop went okay generally speaking. i was the facilitator, and i could have done a better job guiding the session in the direction i thought it should have gone given what i was hearing from the participants, but i didn't feel backed-up by the other slym instructors, so i didn't want to appear as though i was taking over things, especially since they're full-time employees and i don't even really work for slym. i guess i didn't want the tension in our group to be obvious to the attendees, but ultimately, i did the folks who attended a disservice. another lesson learned on my part.

what i thought worked:
- moving the conference permanently to detroit (it's much more accessible than bowling green, oh and more to do/see)
- keeping the standard conference format but encouraging those of us presenting to break out of the traditional session structure
- creating more sessions that are youth-led/youth-oriented (i was supposed to co-facilitate with one of slym's youth, but he dropped out of the trip 2 hours before we were supposed to leave, and no one else in our group wanted to do it)
- shifting the friday educator symposium to a more popular education focus, and leaving the traditional model of the educational industrial complex behind
- continuing to add sessions that emphasize the connection between the arts and social change movements (again, blair's "history of black america as told through music" was awesome)
- the diversity of presenters continues to thrill me, and gets better every year
- making sure youth could attend both the always fun as hell bowling party and music show, even though both locations had bars
- invincible asking cigarette smokers to step outside to help the performers and attendees at the music show not be so overwhelmed (she still ended up losing her voice the next day). as someone with asthma, i appreciated not feeling enveloped in smoke
- having wifi available and free at the conference locations and in the dorms for those of us with laptops (a lot of folks were blogging from the conference). the downside is that there weren't enough power outlets for folks like me whose laptop battery last a whopping 20 minutes without being plugged in. it's minor, but important to me because i take notes on my laptop, not paper, because i can type a hell of a lot faster than i can write.
- the music show and bowling turn out to be odd, but ideal venues to chat up and get to know other people, even if you ended up shouting over the music

what i thought didn't work:
- wayne state university felt very strange to me. it felt like an odd, removed city within a city. the dorms were super convenient and comfortable, but it had a weird 70s horror movie feel to it
- access to food was a problem that really shouldn't have been. the cafeteria in the dorm was open for lunch on friday, but closed for the remainder of the weekend, as were einstein's bagels and starbucks, which meant leaving campus on saturday/sunday to find coffee before 9am. sure, the mcdonald's on campus was open but i don't eat at mcd's unless it's absolutely the only option, and it's the last place i'd turn to for coffee. (the irony being that i'm not a huge coffee drinker. i really only drink it if i have to teach in the morning or in the occasional moments i want an iced coffee.) unfortunately, saturday morning coffee meant leaving campus to find a starbucks which i also hate but for different reasons.
- screening full-length films as they tend to run over because nothing really starts on time, and if you want to see the entire film AND not miss the first 20 minutes of the next session, it's impossible. that being said, "no!" would have benefited from a stand-alone screening time, which i'm sure would have been tough to arrange given the overall conference schedule

on a personal note, there are still far too many activists that need to get over themselves. i can't tell you how many people stared through me, or regarded me as though i weren't worthy of knowing. you know the kind of folks i'm talking about. the following passage is taken out of context, but it touches on what i'm talking about. it's taken from this article.
"The result of this approach to organizing -- as far as I've seen it and been guilty of it myself -- is the phenomenon we call celebrity organizers. Everyone knows their names -- they exist in every community. They are amazing and articulate and energetic and inspirational. But more often than not, folks don't have the skills they need to develop true leadership in others."

there are certain people that i encountered last year at the amc, and got the same reaction from them. what i find interesting is we have mutual friends within the activist community, but i'm not worthy of speaking to unless i'm with those people. it's like i have no credibility unless i'm approved by _____________. is there a polite way to say go to hell to those people? no, there isn't, but just as there's the "oppression olympics" there's also the "activist olympics" and i'm not interested in competing. so to those folks that we've all encountered/will encounter/deal with regularly, get over and beyond yourself, or WE'RE not going to get anywhere. the work you "celebrities" do is awesome and inspiring, but stop acting like you're the only one who can do it, and the rest of us whose names aren't known, aren't doing anything.

i'll say it again, the amc attendees are a physically attractive group. it's very distracting. i have to be very careful though, because at my age, most of the hot ones are too young for me. at this stage, i have to say if you're in you're under 30, you're too young for me.

i actually only have 1 page of written notes, so it feels like i wasn't really there. i feel almost like i'm starting from scratch in my activist work, and maybe that's for the best given my current state of feeling like there's no point in my doing this work. (it'll pass in time, i know.) despite the stress of the weekend, i did come away feeling more energized, and i was ready to carry that energy to the us social forum, but that didn't work out, which means that i wasn't supposed to be present in atlanta for it.